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Ketel One, Dry, Olive. MAKE THAT A DOUBLE!'s Journal
 
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Below are the 12 most recent journal entries recorded in Ketel One, Dry, Olive. MAKE THAT A DOUBLE!'s LiveJournal:

Thursday, February 12th, 2004
3:25 pm
[dorkboi]
gave up drinking for a boyfriend
i miss martinis!!!

Current Mood: annoyed
Wednesday, July 2nd, 2003
8:29 am
[martinicoaster]
Boys That I Have Slept With
I have fucked the following boys:

Tony.
Andrew.
Andrew's boyfriend.
Seth Green.
Three anonymous LJ users.
Dan Rather's gay grandson when we were just fourteen.
Chloe Sevigny.
Josh.
Josh's brother Justin while Josh was in the shower. (Sorry Josh, but your brother was MUCH bigger.)
RuPaul's mexican uncle.

Who have you fucked?
Thursday, June 26th, 2003
2:20 pm
[dartini]
positions...positions...
not so much a question...

what do you boys use to come up with positions...I love moving around all over the palce during sex...I can't just stay in one position for an hour or two...so after the first week with Chris I started throwing in some Yoga-inspired things...works SO good...I Highly reccommend it...downward dog, bridge, warrior 1 pose, plank, and the plow pose all work well. The Kama Sutra is good, but I find that two guys can't do all the shit in there...specially the face to face ones...or the upside down poses...well actually...upside down workes well from the back...say the top is agaisnt a wall...legs spread....bottom is in front, both are facing forward but bottom is in the upside down version of what the top is doing...I guess that one may be more of one that has to be seen....so come on boys...share.


~Carlos

Current Mood: sore
Wednesday, June 25th, 2003
10:28 am
[tres_faux]
Oral exams.
Beautiful tonyz21 asked about oral fixations ...

And this is rather odd, because I've never considered this before. I distinctly remember from the earliest days of childhood chewing on pens and pencils till they broke, leaving me with graphite or ink in my mouth, as well as destroying plastic cups, straws and the strings on my jacket with regularity and aplomb.

However, I don't chew on ANYTHING now. (Other than martini olives and cock.)

How did this come to pass? Here's my theory: I went through a period in my life where I went to raves with horrifying regularity. And at raves, one does drugs. One drug in particular causes you to grind your teeth and chew on anything in your mouth. Ecstasy. Mmmmm. And thus the entire cult of the pacifier with ravers revolves around the need to not chew the fuck out of your toungue.

But for some reason, since that period, I no longer feel the need to chew on things.

And Tony, the wax on those paper cups is disgusting. Freak.
1:18 pm
[tonyz21]
Oral Fixation
Actually this is more a commentary and a survey...

I would like to know who of our tiny group of delectable men has an oral fixation, I used to be a pacifier boy as a baby, but now that I have martinis in my life, olives do a wonderful job at that.

But anyhow, I would like to know what everyone puts in their mouth to get over their oral fixation for the day. Random objects, food, etc. :)

Here is my list:
1) Straws
2) Hard candy
3) Olives from Martinis
4) Pens
5) the edges of paper coffee cups.
6) Kitty ears
1:08 pm
[tonyz21]
Its Spider Cum Man
dartini asked:

I have really sticky cum...REALLY STICKY cum...like my ex nicknamed it spiderman cum...it webs up when you wet it...I'm talking glue consistency...what the hell causes this and how can I make it more...runny?...it's also kinda bitter...like a trolli nightcrawler worm thing...I need something to sweeten up the deal...ALSO...amount...I wanna be like those porn stars...what the hell do they do to shoot all that shit...I mean...ok...I have really big nuts...and I know boys with smaller nuts than mine and they shoot and shoot and shoot...I don't shoot very little but I also don't coat myself in it...I just want MORE how do i do that?...PLEASE HELP...=)



Tony's Response:

Alright, this one requires me to get out my goggles, in case I get cum in my eyes (it burns). :)

1) Water. Water. Water. You need lots of it, you coffee drinker you :) Usually pineapple juice changes the taste of your cum immediately, I dont know why. But i tried it and it works. This is how my roomates know im dating a "swallower" although i personally dont like it when guys do this (its not the safest thing). :)

2) Sorry to hear about your boy and you ending things. But this gives you time to try new things and certainly learn what buttons to push yourself. Nothing like helping a buddy know the ropes of your own equipment (always have guidelines handy). I as a Mexican american have the bad luck of too much spicy food in my diet so that makes my "stuff" well a little too salty. A healthy diet, like Andrew suggested, goes a long way...Oh and uhm, let us know how it went. We love to hear success stories :)
1:00 pm
[tonyz21]
The Hell of a Hello
The hell of a Hello
by Tony Z.

The hell of a hello,
Please try to avoid me tonight.
It's not enough to be an imbecile,
Somehow you miss me every time.
Don't call me tonight.

My only understanding of you
Is at best your avoidance.
How you make me a restriction,
There isn't enough time
A meaningless message you erase.

A victim of my own deviant thoughts,
"Leave a message at the beep".
Messages never answered
Hey, it's me again?call me back.

The hell of saying hello,
Anything you say is always delayed.
Seven major sins,
If I had never said hello,
I wouldn't wait for goodbye.

It only requires an imbecile
To ask you again, a recorded message:
Call me back.
Do you worry about anybody else?
The hell of ever saying hello
Was not knowing when to hang up.

Talking to recorded faint voice
Hey, it's me again, call me back.
There just isn't enough time.
A victim of a hello,
If only you could say goodbye.
Friday, June 20th, 2003
12:13 pm
[tres_faux]
dartini asked:

I have really sticky cum...REALLY STICKY cum...like my ex nicknamed it spiderman cum...it webs up when you wet it...I'm talking glue consistency...what the hell causes this and how can I make it more...runny?...it's also kinda bitter...like a trolli nightcrawler worm thing...I need something to sweeten up the deal...ALSO...amount...I wanna be like those porn stars...what the hell do they do to shoot all that shit...I mean...ok...I have really big nuts...and I know boys with smaller nuts than mine and they shoot and shoot and shoot...I don't shoot very little but I also don't coat myself in it...I just want MORE how do i do that?...PLEASE HELP...=)

Dearest Carlos;

I too have suffered from the issue of sticky cum. I hope the reason you and your ex broke up was not because of your spiderman cum.

I suspect this may have to do with how many fluids you consume during the day. You may be drinking too many salty beverages (salt causes your body to retain moisture) or too many diurectics (caffeine, alcohol) or just plain not drinking enough water. All of this is just conjecture, but I think it DOES have something to do with it.

As for your second question; you probably need to increase the amount of fruits and vegetables in your diet.

And for your third; well, porn stars are sometimes selected for their ability to shoot copious cups of cum. (The easy way to increase the amount is to just not ejaculate for a few days.) Personally, I find that distance can be increased by applying pressure under your balls before cumming or alternately keeping your orgasm at bay for a while. Or a lonnnnnnnnnng time, which can be agonizing yet fun. I also find that the second or third time I cum usually fires farther than the first blast.

Does this help?
1:31 pm
[dartini]
shot in my eye
::grabs a Corona::

::takes a shot of tequila::

::chug chug chug::

::burp::

Ok, umm...my question...

I have really sticky cum...REALLY STICKY cum...like my ex nicknamed it spiderman cum...it webs up when you wet it...I'm talking glue consistency...what the hell causes this and how can I make it more...runny?...it's also kinda bitter...like a trolli nightcrawler worm thing...I need something to sweeten up the deal...ALSO...amount...I wanna be like those porn stars...what the hell do they do to shoot all that shit...I mean...ok...I have really big nuts...and I know boys with smaller nuts than mine and they shoot and shoot and shoot...I don't shoot very little but I also don't coat myself in it...I just want MORE how do i do that?...PLEASE HELP...=)


~Carlos

Current Mood: mischievous
Wednesday, June 18th, 2003
5:56 pm
[tonyz21]
The Process of waiting
My god, You know for someone who is looking for a job in PR (public relations for those that dont know) how come I have to wait sooo long for people to get back to me about getting a job?

Have you ever wondered if this is intended to make people feel better? You know they hold this power over you. Ugh.

Anyhow, I am debating between getting a margarita or a gin and tonic....

Oh and andrew hows that book of yours coming? Huh...A chapter and a rape scene later?
5:40 pm
[tonyz21]
Wisdom Removed...
Oh and the questions poured in...

Me and the fabulous Andrew will be responding to all your incoming questions about any topic, from sex to gay sex to more sex...

Question of the day:
From apathofcinders

I just had my wisdom teeth removed, should I kiss Devin mexitalianboi

Answer from tony: Well just dont stick anything in your mouth, unless Devin is into that kinky bloody thing...
Clean thoroughly and as always take pictures. This will make it to our wall...
1:56 pm
[tres_faux]
Question of the Day (and Tony was drunk while answering this one):

From fernzola

What do I do about that smegma smell? It makes me have less friends :-(

Answer from Tony:
Dahling, I knew that smell was not coming from the kitchen....Ah well, here we go. I suggest a lot bathing especially the foreskin and such, you know make sure to get all those nasty smells out of there. Also after using your equipment for any reason (such as jacking off or something) wipe it clean, no residue. We uncut boys have to be totally clean freaks downstairs, or we are bound to smell.

But alas, the best solution I have found. Get a boy that has a cold. He wont know what hit him, since he cant smell *usually a cold means lack of smell due to the olfactory smells being killed by those nasty boogies. But as to you not having friends, well I suggest you get friends that are a) not smelling your crotch all the time or b) a very nice cologne and body spray.

Andrew? Anything to add?

Andrew:
Sweetie, I really think Tony is holding something back here. The cause of smegma is of course the foreskin, and so the only real solution is to cut that thing off.

Or have a friend do it for you, I've seen this in leather porn.
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